I was reading in Genesis 6 this morning (as many of you may have been), and ran across these verses: And GOD saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually. And it repented the LORD that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart. And the LORD said, I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the earth; both man, and beast, and the creeping thing, and the fowls of the air; for it repenteth me that I have made them. Did it occur to you that this is a very strange thing to read in Genesis 6? If you are following a yearly Bible reading plan, you probably read just yesterday that God created the world and pronounced it all good. A day later, you read that God (this omniscient Being who knows all things from before the foundation of the world) is so perturbed by human sin that He regrets creating the human race and decides to destroy it almost entirely. This is very hard for a reader to understand. I'd like to share with you a quote from a book my husband is writing. God’s regret over man’s sinfulness in Genesis 6:6 does not imply a change in God or that He wished He had done things differently. It simply communicates that God feels in time, when it occurs, what He knew in advance would happen. In other words, God is watching events unfold. He has the ability to be grieved or to rejoice over them. In this passage we hear His cry of grief. When you and I sin, in real time, God (who foreknew each sin of our lives) is grieved over that sin. I was struck with this truth today in a way I never had been before. This would be a sad, discouraging thing for all of us to ponder if the next verse in the passage didn't exist. But Noah found grace in the eyes of the LORD. Noah obeyed God. The passage says it over and over again. Genesis 6:8-9. Genesis 6:22. Genesis 7:1. Genesis 7:5. Genesis 7:16.
Noah heard the Words of God and obeyed them. And just as God sees our sin in real time and grieves, surely He also sees our obedience and our worship in real time and rejoices. It is a new year. New choices face us. You and I have a choice today. We have a choice to hear the Words of God or not. We have a choice to obey or not. We have a choice to grieve God today. Or bring Him great joy. What will you choose? When we as parents have to rebuke our children, what important thing should we remember to include? Life, when you have a passel of sons, is not always good tidings of great joy. Sometimes it includes good chidings of great boys. I have five great boys (and one terrific girl) and they occasionally (okay, often) require me to do some good chidings.
A good chiding should include the good tidings. It should include the Gospel. I say this because I think we sometimes miss it. (I know I do.) We give our rebuke and, especially if the child has already made a profession of faith, we stop there. If we have a child who has not yet turned to Christ with his whole heart, we often will give the Gospel. ("You punched your brother. See? You need Jesus to save you from your sins.") But the Gospel isn't just for unbelievers. The Gospel is also for us--we who know Christ and love Him. We who follow Christ. We who take up our cross and deny ourselves. We who can even say, with Paul, "I die daily." We, also, need the Gospel. We need the memories of it and the meditations on it. We need the effects of it to cleanse our lives. The Gospel isn't just for regeneration. It is also for sanctification. When I heard about a Christian leader a few years ago who had sinned greatly, my first thought was, "The Gospel is for such a time as this." When I faced a time of despair in my own life, when my faith felt minuscule and my troubles and sins seemed overwhelming, I reminded myself, "The Gospel is for such a time as this." When my husband and I counseled a Christian couple who had slashed their marriage apart with sin and were painfully trying to stitch it back together, this thought gave me hope, "The Gospel is for such a time as this." The Gospel is for believers as well as unbelievers. The thought that Jesus Christ died on the cross to save me from my sin doesn't just affect my eternal security, it affects my daily sanctification. It sends me to my knees in contrition when I have sinned. It causes me to fix my eyes on the object of my faith and not just stew about the perceived depth of my faith. It reminds me that Jesus doesn't just cleanse me from pre-regeneration sins but also from my sins NOW. (How often do we fall into that kind of thinking?) When guilt knocks at my door, Christ's blood answers it. When Satan's mocking accusations threaten my peace, the sacrifice of my good Shepherd restores my soul. Because of the Gospel, I know that I can always triumph. The head of the serpent has already been crushed. The Bible says that the goodness of God leads us to repentance. What gives a sin-blackened Christian hope to even begin to confess and forsake sins? The cross. The depth of Christ's love. The goodness of God. When you, as a parent, give good chidings to your children, include the Gospel. Even if they are already saved. The Gospel is for such a time as this. And the next time you find yourself in a position of sin (probably a few minutes from now, if you are fully human), remind yourself that the Gospel is for such a time as this. We are often offended or hurt by the actions of others. When this happens, what should we do? We were reading Joshua 12 before breakfast. Or, I should say, we were trying to. For some reason, this Monday morning reading was punctuated by internal chaos. There were a few funny names in the passage (names like "Og" just beg for discussion), and then there was a heated controversy about the Chinneroth Sea and whether it actually looks like a harp. One of my three-year-olds was so intently looking at the map in Daddy's Bible that he sprawled headlong across the table. It tickled us. He looked up and saw us laughing and immediately misunderstood the laughter. With a hurt look on his face, he told us sternly, "It's not funny!" Which, of course, made us laugh even harder. Not at him, you understand, but at his all-around cuteness. Which he misinterpreted and then became even more offended. Daddy noticed. "Don't look at them," he said gently to him. "Look at me and I will smile at you. I love you." He smiled at my three year old with love. Three times during the course of the meal he said the same thing. Once someone looked at someone else with a funny look on their face. (Yes, surprisingly, my children do this. Even more surprisingly, my children are offended by this.) "Well, don't look at him," Tim said to the offended person. "Look at me and I will smile at you. Like this." He smiled. I was moved by this display of fatherly love. I was moved almost to tears, primarily because I could see my heavenly Father's love in the actions of my husband. Have you ever been offended by someone else? They gave you a funny look, or they said something hurtful, or they pointed out a fault of yours that you would prefer they overlooked. Perhaps it was done in love, but perhaps not. Perhaps it was done out of extreme spite or blatant maliciousness. I have an idea for you. When someone hurts you, don't look at them. Look at your Father. He is smiling at you with love. Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love. Singers croon these words. Novels portray them as if they were a proverb. Whole movies are produced with this one piece of bad advice as their theme. And yet, it is quite possibly the worst advice ever given about marriage: "Follow your heart." "Follow your heart." Really? Follow my heart? That is all I need to do to end up in a marriage marked by commitment and fidelity? My heart will constantly give me good advice about whatever decisions I need to make today? My heart, which is wise beyond words, will always lead me in the right path? This kind of thinking is radical nonsense. Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?” Is that the kind of compass you want to use? A deceitful compass that snickers as it points southeast instead of north? Don't follow this advice. It is dangerous advice for any realm of our lives but especially dangerous in the realm of marriage. We are already predisposed to heed the deceitful compass of our hearts when it comes to the emotional area of relationships. Following advice like this can send us right over the edge of a cliff like a herd of naïve lemmings. In no other area of life do we tell people, “Just follow your heart, dearie, and everything will work out.”
And yet, when it comes to marriage, we are inundated with books and movies and songs instructing us to ignore everything else in life and follow our heart.
Please don’t follow your heart. Not if it contradicts the teaching of Scripture in any way. The Word of God gives you wisdom to follow. Follow that. Ignore your deceitful heart. It will only get you into trouble down the road. I know the objection that plagues you when you read about this: “If I don’t follow my heart, will I marry someone I don’t love and live in an emotionless marriage forever?” Highly unlikely! God is not a malicious Father who gives you stones instead of bread or a snake instead of a fish. He is a loving Father who knows what you need and what will ultimately please you even more than you do. Wouldn’t it be nice if God spoke from the sky directly to you and told you who to marry? And then promised you a love-filled and fulfilling marriage of the sort that has you holding hands and kissing in corridors when you are seventy? He doesn’t do that, specifically, but He does give signposts to follow. They are found within the pages of His Word. (You aren’t reading His Word? That’s the problem right there.) Jeremiah 13:10 talks about people who refuse to hear God’s Words and who instead stubbornly follow their own heart. Their heart that, a few chapters later we are told, is deceitful and desperately wicked. A wacky compass. "Follow your heart” is possibly the worst advice ever given about marriage, but here is the best: follow the Words of God. You can’t go wrong when you do that, because God’s Word is a lamp for your feet and a light for your path. It will keep you from stumbling over obstacles and it will show you where the correct road lies. Don’t follow your heart. Guard your heart. Follow God’s Word. If you liked this post, you might also like:
Six Very Important Questions to Ask About a Potential Mate and the Will of God series: Part One--Sometimes We Ask For A Stone Part Two--Why Did God Say No? Part Three--Open Doors and God's Will Do you read your Bible in the morning and then walk away from it unchanged? Add these five things to your devotions to transform your time with the Lord. 1. A pen. If you aren't taking notes, how can you hope to remember what God is teaching you? Write down special verses that the Lord ministered to your heart. Take notes each day on what you learn. 2. Paper. I don't mean the back of a grocery receipt or random sticky notes. Have a journal or some other official devotional notebook for keeping track of the things you learn. Write out your prayers. Write down your burdens. Write down your blessings. Read back through your devotional notes periodically to see how the Lord has led you on your journey of spiritual growth. 3. A place. Preferably a quiet place where you can be alone. I like the kitchen table or my desk. My husband prefers his desk. My daughter reads in her room. My son goes to the table in front of our house. I have a guest who stays with us sometimes who carries a chair outside to the back of our house. When we travel and our whole family is sleeping in one hotel room, my husband or I will often hole up in the bathroom to read. Really, anything works, as long as you can focus on the one needful thing: spending time with the Lord without distraction. 4. A plan. You can randomly open your Bible to read and still be blessed--that is the glory of the Word of God. But you will find yourself learning much more if you have a plan for how to read your Bible and what to read each day. This could be a one-year plan or a two-year plan or a one-year Bible. It could be a check-off sheet or even a simple three-chapters-a-day method. Pick a plan and stick to it for a year or two. See what a difference it makes! 5. A secret weapon. My secret weapon is coffee. Some people prefer juice or a morning jog to keep them awake while reading. Maybe you don't need one of these. . . this one is optional. But if you frequently find yourself dozing off, try using a secret weapon to keep yourself alert and learning. Let the Word of Christ dwell in you richly this year! Being the wife of a pastor is a life besieged by the expectations of other people. How can you handle these expectations in a way that brings God glory? Pastors' WivesThey are the superheroes of the church. Piano player, flower-arranger, church secretary, Sunday School teacher, librarian, punch-maker, casserole-baker, children’s choir director, hostess for out-of-town guests, and often the janitor. Woman, thy name is Pastor’s Wife! Stand up and take a bow (before you flop on the floor of the lobby in sheer exhaustion). Pastors' wives have the dubious privilege of being in one of the professions most pierced with the unrealistic expectations of other people. (I’m sure being the wife of a president or prime minister carries some of the same challenges to an even greater degree. I’m so glad I’m not called to that, aren’t you?!) Quite often these expectations are completely contradictory. If you are the wife of a man in the ministry, you are expected by some people to hold down a full-time secular job (to support the pastor since the church can’t) or never to make money on the side (since you should not need money when God provides all your needs). You are expected to both oversee the nursery and teach the children’s church, even though they take place at the same time. You are expected to make all the meals for the church fellowships and yet allow all the other women to make their specialty foods. You are expected to keep your own house absolutely glisteningly clean so that you can have company at any moment and yet always be at the church in order to meet secretarial or janitorial needs. You are expected to rear your children in such a way that they will be angelic examples for everyone else, and yet be prepared to desert your family at a moment’s notice in order to meet everyone else's urgent needs. These expectations from everyone around you could lead to stress, discouragement, irritation, or apathy. Instead of giving in to these natural responses, free yourself from the expectations of others and focus on God’s expectations for you! The truth is, God made every pastor’s wife differently. Some are piano geniuses; others can’t carry a tune in a bucket. Some are natural organizers; others struggle with making their beds in the mornings. Some have secretarial skills that would make a Fortune 500 executive’s office manager blush; some can’t type and have to beg their teenagers to turn on the computer for them. I like to think of pastors' wives as a bouquet of flowers in the hand of God. Pastors' wives, like flowers, are lovely in their variety: all different colors, all different types of flowers, with all different beautiful scents. Some are tall, elegant, and reserved like a Calla Lily. Others are as cheerful as a daffodil. Some have the vibrancy of tulips; others have the delicacy of roses. Each one is unique, with different strengths and weaknesses. And each one adds to the beauty of God’s Kingdom. If you are a lay person, take a moment to look at your pastor’s wife this way. Don’t judge her by your expectations. Ask yourself instead what her God-given strengths are. And then watch the way she uses those strengths for the glory of God and the church. And thank God for her. If you are a pastor’s wife, don’t be weighed down by the unrealistic expectations of others. Understand that people pay a high compliment to your role when they magnify all of the potential ways in which that role can be fulfilled. But filter those expectations through two things: 1. Your knowledge of God and His will for you. 2. Your husband’s needs and desires. When God first made Eve, He gave her a high calling: to be a helper fit for her husband. That, my dear friend, is your true calling. . . just as it is for every wife. Yes, there are many other ways of fulfilling your role. I have met pastors' wives all over the world who are fulfilling their roles in beautiful, unique ways. But don’t forget these two most important things: God and your husband. If you get those right, everything else will fall into line. Live with that mission. Before the wedding, true love waits. But after you are married, there are a few things that true love doesn't wait for. . . Read this guest post at Rooted Thinking.
In honor of Mother's Day, I would like to share a present with all those mothers who look well to the ways of their household! I did a little math this morning.
If I have 8 people in my household and I serve each of them 3 meals a day, that equals 24 meals that I serve each day. (That part of the math was simple.) Multiply that times 365. 24 x 365 = 8,760 That is how many meals (approximately) that I serve in one year. Wow. Why am I mentioning this? Because all of that meal-serving takes planning. We mothers need to PLAN to serve healthy, delicious meals to our family. Whistling our way though our day expecting it to just happen is kind of like believing in the Big Bang. Wishful thinking. Moms, we are the prime ministers of our homes. Meal planning is one way of serving our families on a daily basis. Let's do it well. And this year, let's do it pretty with this weekly menu planning sheet. This will be available for download this week, in honor of Mother's Day! Download it for yourself or for a mother who is special to you. Happy meal planning, Moms! (If you will excuse me, I need to go make 8 breakfasts!) I was reading the Bible at the breakfast table to my children in my best effort to uphold the Tim Berrey tradition while he was away for the week teaching a CEP (Continuing Education for Pastors) class in Mindanao.
We were in the book of Revelation, and at first I had everyone's attention. (Dragons! Beasts! Trumpets!) But then something happened. First David saw the toy zebras and wanted them. He is at that age of toddlership where children repeat the same thing over and over until you acknowledge that you heard it. "Zebra, Mommy? Zebra? Zebra?" Then, just as I assured him that I had accurately interpreted his words (but that he needed to wait until we were done reading to play with the zebras) and began to read again, the toast popped up. Our toaster is uncertain how to go about its job. Sometimes the toast is white and sometimes it is black. We love it anyway, but we know we have to babysit it. So the kids were all telling each other to go check the toast. Finally we got that settled (perfect toast), and I began reading again. And then. . . Just as I was reading about how the accuser of the brethren is conquered by the blood of the Lamb, one of my boys saw his own revelation: a dead cockroach under the table. Actually, it wasn't dead. It was still in the lala land bugs go to when they end up on their backs. His legs and feelers were still waving, but he wasn't going anywhere. The Word of God is far more important than that. "We will take care of him later," I announced, mustering up my best Mommy voice. And we finished reading. Powerful passage. They forgot about the cockroach until I kept my promise and "took care" of him later. "Eeewww," my boys said, with evident enjoyment. Zebras, toast, and cockroaches. They pull our attention away from the one needful thing. The most important part of the day. The thing without which we cannot spiritually survive in this world. What takes your attention away from the Word of God? The zebras were toys. There is nothing wrong with them. But they are not something to focus on, either. We adults have our own toys. (Hint: most of them are on our computer or cell phone.) Are they drawing our attention away from the Word of God? The toast was breakfast. Food. A necessary thing. But even the necessities of life have their place. We cannot let them take precedence over our Word time. Man cannot live by bread alone, but by every Word that proceeds from the mouth of God. The cockroach? Well, we all know what kinds of revolting, despicable things there are out there. (Some of those things show up in movie theaters around Valentines Day.) Don't play with them. Don't dirty your hands and your lives with them. Kill them. Practice radical amputation when you find them infesting your life. Cockroaches are scum-suckers. Bottom-feeders. Dead or alive, they are creepy-crawly disgustingness. It is better to enter heaven with one hand or one eye than to be cast out forever because that part of your body kept you from the Lord. Let's be as hasty to kill the moral scum in our lives as we are to kill the cockroaches under our tables. Zebras, toast, and cockroaches. It is a new day, a new week. A new start. Give the Lord the first part--the best part--of your day. When you read the Word, focus. Don't be distracted. My personal rule of thumb is that God gets my time and attention before I turn on my computer or open a book. Unless there is an emergency or an urgent need, nothing comes before my time with Him. It is a habit that has become a tremendous blessing to me. And, if you have children, the best thing you can do for them today is to help them, also, to focus on the Word. Zebras, toast, and cockroaches. The Word of God is far more important than these things. I spoke a few Saturdays ago to a Ladies' Fellowship about Rest for Weary Mamas. I found the topic intensely personal, as the last several months had been so busy that I was not sure I really knew what the word rest even meant anymore. My nights were short and naps had become a distant memory. I was the ultimate weary mama. I was so busy I was afraid I would not have time to adequately study this topic of rest. And when I say that I was busy, I don't mean I was busy as in, "I really should write a blog--it's been two months" busy. But more like, "My husband is gone for the week to Mindanao on a ministry trip and I have two two-year-olds who thrive on getting into everything and if I skip homeschooling this week my first grader will have to skip summer this year and my laundry is piled to four foot five and I really, really need to go grocery shopping or we will have to turn to foraging." And beyond the extracurricular writing and the mundane necessities of life lay a whole list of things I really should have been doing: potty-training my two-year-old twins, for instance. Writing music for an upcoming flute group piece. Talking through our goals for the year with my husband and putting them in writing so that we can move forward on accomplishing them. Finishing the English translation of a Tagalog song I had been working on for months. Preparing for my Saturday talk, especially. All of those things were important. Many were urgent. But the thing that put me over the edge that week was the fundraising concert our Bible college held the week before my talk. The first half of the concert was a compilation of music written and performed by BJMBC faculty, students, and their church choirs. One of the goals of our Music Director, Doug Bachorik, is to mentor Filipinos in producing quality Filipino music for churches. It was a joy to hear some of that music at the concert. I was remotely involved in the first half of the concert as a flute player for a lovely piece that my friend Asenath Cadavos wrote and sang. (It just so happens that my husband was teaching a group of pastors at her church in Mindanao the same week we were preparing for the concert here in Manila. God's small details in life are like the stitches on a piece of vintage French lace: intricate, intertwined, and beautiful.) Although my part in the concert was small, it still required attending some practices and the rehearsal. Which meant that my family was fractured that Friday. Two of my children attended the rehearsal with me at the Meralco Theater, my husband flew in from Mindanao and took a taxi directly there to meet us, a friend drove our other two children and guests there, and another friend babysat my twins at home. Me. . . I just prayed really hard that everybody ended up at the right time in the right place. Which amazingly, by the grace of God, they did. And the concert was a resounding success. The second half of the concert (which I thankfully was able to sit through as a member of the audience) was the Asian premiere of Dan Forrest's Requiem for the Living.
This piece shatters all preconceptions about what music with deep religious overtones and Latin texts might sound like. It is powerful, gripping, and transparently honest. Dark but far from bleak. An explosion of joy and reverence. If you have not heard it yet, stop reading this post right now and go here for an unspeakably riveting experience. Ideally you should listen to it with a translation in front of you so you can understand what is being sung. Because there is no English in the entire piece. The whole thing is in Latin. . . almost. Now, my life is like that French lace, and one other detail that God sometimes stuns me with is the fact that during the one (and only) year of my high school teaching career, one of the classes I taught was Latin. To Koreans. In English. (I was qualified for that because I actually studied Latin for about one year, as an audit, while I was swamped with work and graduate classes. Scary.) But still. . . My Latin is rusty at best. I was thankful for the translation in the program booklet. I hope you stopped reading and listened to the entire piece. If you did, you probably noticed that in the last movement, Lux Aeterna, the sole line of English was this: "Come unto me, all ye who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." I assume that this is the composer's way of turning an incandescent English spotlight on that ocean of roiling Latin and illuminating the one great, irrevocable rock of rest for our lives: Christ Jesus. If you have Christ, you have rest for your soul. Eternal rest. Requiem eaternam. That is the kind of rest that matters the most. Our house guests that week were dear friends of ours from Singapore. I was writhing under the knowledge that they were going to sit patiently through a concert that literally had no English in it. I don't regret that fact for their sake anymore. The music was incredible, and since the English was in the program, I am sure they were as blessed as I was. But that gem of English at the end would have been worth it all anyway. As for me, God spoke to me through His Word set to music. He reminded me that I can go ahead and weary myself with all the every day busy-ness of this life, all of the chaotic Vanitas Vanitatum, because He Himself provides my rest at the end of it all. There remaineth yet a rest. I may be short on rest physically. But spiritually? Aaaah. Now that's a different story, because I have a light and easy yoke on my shoulders, and my Yokefellow bears the brunt and the bruises of all of my burdens. He shares the load. And He is meek and lowly of heart: instead of cracking the whip over me, He is the One who gives me rest. Both now and forever. I rode to the ladies' fellowship with my friend, Doctora Ina Bunyi, who was also speaking that day. On the way, we discussed the busy week we both had. I discovered that my lack of sleep the night before was far eclipsed by her lack of sleep the night before. She taught on rest that day with a little over two hours of sleep logged the night before. Some people might find that ironic. We did not. We found it amazing. God-honoring. Self-emptying. Because the kind of rest we spoke of and needed was not physical rest--although that is also important--but the spiritual rest Christ offers to all who come to Him. And God knew we needed to live this truth before we could speak to others about it. Come unto me, all ye who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Eternal rest through His salvation. Daily rest through His Word. Have you come to Him yet? Has He given you rest for your soul? Is He giving your daily rest through His Word? |
Tim and LauraTimothy and Laura Berrey are missionaries with Gospel Fellowship Association. They share a passion for missions which has taken them to several countries in Africa, Asia, and Europe. They currently minister in the Philippines. Want articles like this delivered to your inbox?
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