Following Your Leader

Are you following your husband?

I was jogging this morning, happily heading up the other side of our block, when I saw the handsomest man I have ever seen! He was coming down the street, headed right for me, and he was also out for his morning exercise. So I did the only thing any sane woman would do. I turned around and joined him.

Given the fact that I am over forty, I don't often turn around to join other people in their morning exercise. I have my little routine, and I stick to it. We oldies but goodies are afraid of change.

But for this particular guy, I would do anything. Because he's my husband.

Now, normally my husband jogs with my daughter. He's a man and she's a teenager, so they are way beyond me, fitness-wise. They jog three times a week and go around the block three or four times. I do it twice on a good day (though I am slowly doing more and have high hopes that by the end of the year I might be able to keep up with them). They also purely do that thing called jogging. I, on the other hand, do that erratic speed walk/jog thing that women over forty often do for exercise. I also go the opposite way around the block for reasons that nobody would be able to understand, so I won't disclose.

But back to my story.

When I saw my husband, I left my exercise routine and followed him.

I've been doing that for years, come to think of it, starting from the day I walked down the aisle and said "I do."

My husband says that saying "I do" is basically saying "I die," because it means you are making a commitment to die to self for the other person. This morning I did this by dying to my exercise and living for his. And then I died some more, because his legs are about three feet longer than mine, which means I have to take two steps for every one of his. Not fair! I was also dying for breath and my muscles were whimpering and my heart was pumping so fast I thought it would explode. And I also nearly died with surprise when I actually jogged the whole way around the block with only a very small pause to speed walk once or twice. I didn't think I could do that.

But it made me think about marriage in general. How this is exactly what I, as a wife, have had to do on a meta scale.

• When he asked me to marry him, I turned around and followed him.
• When he was called to teach at a Bible college in Wisconsin, I turned around and followed him.
• When God told him to go to Cambodia for a summer, I turned around and followed him.
• When God told him to go to South Africa the next summer, I turned around and followed him.
• When God told him to leave Wisconsin and go to the Philippines, I turned around and followed him.

But sometimes the small-scale about-faces are harder to make than the large ones. Maybe it was easy for you to turn around and follow your husband when he knelt and offered you a dozen roses and a diamond ring. But maybe it's far harder when he asks you to. . .

• Start a budget.
• Trust his decisions.
• Have another child.
• Begin doing family devotions.
• Take on a new ministry.
• Move to a new job.
• Tithe.

​And there are even smaller, sometimes harder, ways to stop, turn around, and follow our husbands by dying to self. We can stop pouring our coffee in order to pour our husband his. Stop talking to a friend on the phone in order to talk to him. Stop sweeping the kitchen floor in order to iron his shirt. Stop putting away laundry in order to offer him a glass of water. Stop whatever we are doing when he gets home from work in order to meet and greet him with a kiss.

So I ask you: in what way can you turn around and follow your husband toda