Some mornings I open my Bible and immediately both my mind and heart are fully engaged in the reading of God's Word. Other mornings I have to constantly wrestle my thoughts back to the Lord. Is there anything we can do to maintain our focus during our devotional time?

1. Pray before you begin.  
Ask God to help you focus on His Word and His still, small voice.

2. Remember, spending time at the feet of Jesus is the "one needful thing" in your day (Luke 10:42).
All those other distractions will simply crowd out the most important part of your day.  Don't let them.

3. Remove as many distractions as possible before you start. 
How? Analyze these areas:

• Time. Can you meet with God early in the morning before other tasks crowd into your mind?
• People. Where can you go to be alone?
• Things. Monitor where you meet with God. What things are visible that will distract you? 
• Sounds. Can you meet with God in a quiet location? Soft music playing may help you, but it also may distract you. 

4. As distracting thoughts come to your mind, write them down.
Then focus on your devotions again. Sometimes it is the fear of forgetting something important that is so distracting. Writing those things down leaves your mind free to focus once again.

5. If your thoughts continue to stray, try singing a hymn of worship to refocus your mind.
Music has a way of helping us to refocus.

Mark 1:35 tells us that Jesus went out alone into a deserted place early in the morning to pray. He planned to be focused.

What can you do tomorrow to maintain your focus during your devotional time?

Allow God to use His Word to give you wisdom for your life!  
Read:
Five Ways to Shine the Light of Scripture on Your Pathway

We love ancestral lore in our family. It gives me a sense of familial attachment and continuity to know, for instance, that I am a descendant of a Reformation Era martyr, and that one of my shadowy fore-mothers was abducted by Indians and wandered out of the woods several years later with a little half-breed baby. My father's family even has its own form of the "I'm my own Grandpa" story that requires a large whiteboard and several different colors of markers to map out.

But then there are those other stories. The black sheep legends.  The dusty skeletons that hang out in ancestral closets.

For instance, from way back in my husband's family tree, the story is told of how one boy's mother came home from serving a funeral dinner at her local church and thus did not have her own family supper on the table at the normal time. His father was so incensed at his wife that he refused to speak to her for several weeks. Scared by the silence reigning in the house, the boy went to his grandmother for advice and sympathy and was understandably perturbed when his grandmother answered airily, "Oh, honey, don't worry about that! There have been times when your grandfather didn't speak to me for months."

Besides the fact that this reminds us that our children will follow in our footsteps, it also illustrates the wrong way to give your spouse the silent treatment.

Recently I experienced a sore throat and lost my voice for several days. My husband and children enjoyed it a little too much, I think, in spite of their professions otherwise. (My kids declared they preferred my normal voice over my hoarse whispers and randomly generated sign language.) But those few days had a profitable impact on me: whilst stranded on my isle of pain without a voice, I gave some extra thought to the power of words, specifically when I should use them and when I should exercise my right to remain silent.

In marriage, for instance, there are seven excellent reasons we should opt to give our husbands the silent treatment.

​1.  When we are tempted to tear him down, be sarcastic, or speak unkindly.

• ​Proverbs 31:26 says the virtuous woman opens her mouth with wisdom, and in her tongue is the law of kindness. Bambi's friend Thumper was right, even if his grammar was wrong:  "If you can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all."
• Colossians 4:6 says, "Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man." 
• Ephesians 4:29  Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.

If you have something truthful to say that might be discouraging to him, can you say it with love in a way that will build him up? As wives, our goal is to encourage our husband; therefore in both our attitudes and in our speech there should be no jeering, just cheering. Be your man's biggest fan.
​

2.  When we are discontent or ungrateful.
Women who are discontent may drive their husbands to make foolish decisions. Have you ever heard about a man who went too deeply in debt for a house he couldn't afford, because his wife expressed discontentment over their living quarters? Has your husband ever done something special for you and you "thanked" him by expressing your wish that he had done something else? If you can't be grateful, be silent until you can!
Ultimately, the surest way to develop gratitude toward your husband is to be thankful to God. (Eph. 5:4, 19-20)

3.  When we are frustrated about a decision he has made. (Ephesians 5:33)
No, his opinions and decisions are not always perfect.  Newsflash: neither are mine or yours. I'm blessed to be married to a man who asks for and wants my opinion, but that doesn't mean he always does what I suggest.
A few months ago my husband made a decision that I didn't like (after listening thoughtfully to my opinion). For several months, every time the subject came up, I let him know how I disagreed with him over that particular matter. Thankfully, the Lord convicted me about what I was doing and gave me grace to apologize to him and adjust my attitude. I ended up loving the choice he made. (Go figure.) God blesses us when we let our husbands take leadership in our homes.

4.  When our words or tone of voice will convey disrespect.  (II Samuel 6:16-23)
Ask Michal if disrespectful words are worth the consequences. When King David came back to Jerusalem with the Ark of the Lord, his uninhibited worship in the streets struck his wife as undignified and she despised him in her heart. When he came home to bless his house, she met him with a gush of pent-up criticism that their relationship never recovered from. Listen to the way you speak to your husband. Do your words convey reverence or disrespect? (I have found this resource very helpful when it comes to hearing a man's viewpoint on what comes across as disrespect.)

5.  When we are angry.
Maybe he hurt your feelings with some unkind or angry words of his own. Or forgot your birthday. Or made a poor financial choice. Take some time to cool down and control your spirit. Don't immediately blast him with your anger.
Proverbs has some choice words to say about anger:

• A wrathful man stirreth up strife: but he that is slow to anger appeaseth strife. (15:18)
• He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city. (16:32)
• The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression. (19:11)

6.  When we have an unholy urge to blame-shift.
Blame-shifting is as old as the Garden of Eden.  "But the woman You gave me. . ."  "But the serpent. . . " We wives are not immune to the temptation. Just like Eve, when our husband blames us for something, we automatically want to respond by passing that blame on, either back at him or towards someone or something else. Instead, we should look honestly at our lives, evaluate the blame that is ours, own it, and confess it.

7.  When we are tempted to ask a leading question.
Are your questions a test to see if he can get the right answer? We all know what this is like. "Does this dress make me look fat?" (My father had a droll answer for that one: "No, dear, that dress doesn't make you look fat.")
Maybe, like me, you start conversations by asking for advice you have no intention of heeding. "Do you think Junior should sign up for Little League?" (Because you don't want him to, and when your husband innocently says, "Sure," you plan to give him a bulleted list of all the reasons it is a bad idea.)
Just. Don't. Do. This.

We women are good with our tongues.  We wield them with all the zeal of a warrior sometimes. It would help us to remember that "when words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent" (Proverbs 10:19). Sometimes, in order to nurture our relationship, we should instead choose to give our husbands the "silent treatment." 

Did you like this post?  You might also like When True Love Doesn't Wait.

​The (hopefully fictional) story is told of the man who was seeking God's will for his life. With all good intentions, he decided to open the Bible randomly and follow whatever instruction he found there. Closing his eyes, he allowed his Bible to fall open and placed his finger on the page. When he opened his eyes, he read, "And Judas went out and hanged himself." Eyes bulging with fear, he tried again, and this time his finger landed on the verse, "Go and do thou likewise." Trembling, he tried yet once more.  "What thou doest, do thou quickly."
​
This method of randomly opening the Scripture has been employed through the years by many well-meaning Christians. Unfortunately, when making a decision, it is not the best method of allowing the Word of God to guide you. 

The Bible does have the answers to your questions and can, indeed, aid you in making decisions! What are some correct methods for letting the Word of God shine light on your pathway?

​1. Start with clear commands of Scripture.

• If you are still single and wondering if a certain person is God's will for your life, there is a command of God found in Scripture that should guide your initial thinking:  "Be not unequally yoked together with unbelievers."  (II Corinthians 6:14)
• If you want to know whether or not you should pay taxes, read Romans 13:7.
• Should you mooch off other people or should you seek employment?  See II Thessalonians 3:10.

2.  Study passages that relate specifically to your decision or circumstance.

• If you are a believing woman who is married to an unbeliever, God has a passage in scripture just for you:  I Peter 3:1-6
• If you are newly married and want to find out how to be a virtuous wife, you can turn to Proverbs 31: 10-31.
• Pastors who want to know how to shepherd their congregation can study the book of Titus. 
• Those who are lacking in faith can find great help in Hebrews 11.
• A man who wants to know how to love his wife as Christ loved the church could read Ephesians 5:25-33 and I Corinthians 13.

3.  Reflect on Biblical principles found in Scripture.
Perhaps there is no clear command and you can't think of a single passage that relates specifically to your circumstances. Are there any general principles in Scripture that would relate to your dilemma? 
For example, I Corinthians 10:31 says that whether we eat or drink, or whatever we do, we should do it  all to the glory of God. Let this principle guide you by asking yourself questions, such as:

• Is the decision you are about to make going to give others the right opinion of God?  
• Will it make Him big in other people's eyes?

Meditate on these general principles for the purpose of application.

4.  Look for Biblical examples of people in life circumstances that are similar to yours.  

• For instance, if you are a woman who has been married some time and hasn't been able to have children, you may draw comfort--and even instruction--from the lives of women like Hannah, Elizabeth, and Sarah.
• If you were hated or abused by family members who should have loved and cherished you, you will profit greatly from studying the life of Joseph.

5.  Contemplate principles God is teaching you in your personal devotional time.
God is sovereign over your Bible reading. He uses your life circumstances each day to more deeply embed the truths you read that morning into your heart. And He also uses the Scripture that you read to meet the needs of your day. Your personal time in the Word every day is a necessity.

This article was adapted from the book Planning Your Life God's Way: Practical Help From the Bible for Making Decisions by Timothy Berrey.

​Imagine if you were wealthy beyond measure.  You had a delightful family, with many children.  And then, suddenly, disaster struck.  Your wealth was stolen and destroyed.  Your children were all killed. . .  You received notice of this tragedy all in one day, as one after another of your stocks and bonds nose-dived, your houses collapsed, and your children died from a natural disaster that could only have come from God.  

Would you say with Job, ​

Hedged in.  

Fenced in.  Covered over.  Shut up.  Entwined as in a net.  

Would you feel this way about your life?  That the Almighty One is shutting you up as in a jail cell, covering you up with miseries one upon another? 

Would you wish for death?  

And is Job right in saying the Almighty has fenced him in?

After all, that sounds harsh.  Imagine the God you serve--and Job knows his own righteousness before God, although he admits that even he has sinned and committed transgressions--imagine that God imprisoning you in tragedies as in a cell.

Has God truly hedged Job in?

Ah. . . The irony.
The great, successful irony of the book of Job.  

If we were to take out the first two chapters of the book, we would be irate because we wouldn't understand the layers of meaning in this story.  

But we had just read, a few chapters before, Satan's own words to God: ​

Satan accuses God of favoritism.  Of "hedging" Job in.  Of fencing in not only Job, but all his house, and all his wealth.  All the houses and wealth that God Himself had given Job. 
 
And guess what?  God doesn't deny it.  He, in fact, adjusts the fence, thus proving that there is a fence; there is an actual hedge.  He moves the boundary line.  He tightens it a little, adjusts it to fit Job only.  There is still a fence.  Job was right about that.  He just didn't understand the nature of the hedge.  But Satan does.

"Go ahead," God says to Satan.  "Do what you want to his possessions.  Only don't touch Job himself."

What Job doesn't know is about to hurt him.  What Job doesn't know is that God Himself, the Almighty One, is using him as an example of righteousness.  For Satan, for the angels, for the readers of this inspired, preserved Book for ever and ever to come.  For you.  For me.

Job doesn’t know his pain is a direct result of his righteousness.  

So Job suffers greatly.

And then, to complicate matters, God moves the fence again.  Satan comes back from walking to and fro upon the earth, prowling, stalking the righteous.  Meddling where he is able.  Seeking whom he may devour.

And God points Job out to him again.  "See that man?  You said he would curse me to my face.  Where are his curses?"

Does God know that Satan will ask for a smaller fence?  

Surely.  He is the all-knowing One.

Satan, predictably destructive, does:  "Let me touch his body.  He will curse you to your face."

God:  "Go ahead, but spare his life."  

The fence tightens even more.

So now Job is sitting in the ashes, scraping his boils with old shards of pottery.  Lots of time on his hands to think.  No wealth to oversee.  No children to email.  Even his relationship with his wife seems strained.

He starts thinking about all God has done to him.  

Wait. . . Has God done this terrible thing?  

We as readers are torn.  We know it was Satan.  Yet, God provoked Satan to ask for this.  We know God's sovereignty; we just saw it in action as He moved the fence once, twice, and as He grants permission for Satan to afflict Job.  The obvious conclusion is that Satan needs permission from God.  He can't touch Job without it. 

The players in the book all know this too.  At least, they sense it somehow.  The servant says, "The fire of God fell from heaven and burned up the sheep."  Job says, "The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away."  Satan says to God, "Stretch out Your hand and touch his bone and his flesh and he will curse You to Your face."  And even God Himself says to Satan, "You incited me against him to destroy him without reason."

Everyone in the story agrees that God is responsible for all of this.  Even though Satan is the one who wreaks the havoc in Job's life.

God is responsible for the hedges in our lives.  And He is responsible when they are shifted.

Do we rejoice and take comfort in that during times of personal suffering?
​

​There are three parts to this Spiritual Fitness Journal:

1. Planning for Spiritual Fitness — In this section you can keep your Bible Reading calendar (you can print one from the internet:  many websites offer various plans).  It is a wonderful thing if you can read through your Bible each year.  But you have to plan for that!  It has to be a priority in your life.  My suggestion is to make your devotional time the first activity in your day.  You can also include a personal prayer journal in this section or three-hole punch your church prayer sheet.

2. Knowing My God — In this section are pages for you to fill out as you read through your Bible daily.  You are learning about who He is.  You can choose the qualities or characteristics of God that you want to focus on.  Examples of titles for your pages could be, “My God IS LOVE,” “My God IS MERCIFUL,” “My God HATES SIN,” or “My God is SOVEREIGN OVER NATURE.” 

3. Knowing What My God Wants – In this section are more pages for you to fill out as you read through your Bible daily. This is another way of learning about God.  You are learning about what He wants.  Some examples of titles for your pages could be, “My God wants me OBEY HIS COMMANDMENTS,” “My God wants me to FOLLOW HIM,” “My God wants me to LOVE OTHERS,” “My God wants me to FEAR ONLY HIM.”
 
Using your Spiritual Fitness Journal is a way to become Spiritually Fit as you consume His Word, applying it to your life through meditation.  As you fill out these pages and add more (you can reproduce these pages for yourself), you will find that your notebook will become filled with your knowledge about God.  As you struggle with fear, for instance, you can apply God’s Word to your life by reading through all the Bible verses on the page you have titled:  “My God wants me to FEAR ONLY HIM.”  If you have filled out pages about “My God is SOVEREIGN OVER NATURE” or “My God SUPPLIES ALL MY NEEDS” or “My God IS MY DEFENDER,” you can apply those verses also to the problem of fear. 

This notebook will not only bless you and help you to grow spiritually, but can also be your tool as the Lord helps you to feed others His Word and to become a “Spiritual Fitness Coach” to others around you.  My own life has been transformed as I have used this notebook.  I pray yours will be also.  May God bless you and use you in the place He has put you!

If you choose to use this notebook, I would love to hear if it has been a blessing to you.

Are you failing to meet your goals because of a long list of excuses?  
This one simple mental adjustment will help you to banish excuses and accomplish your goals.

My Exercise Excuse Script

Laura to self:  I need to go jogging.

Internal Excuse Maker:  Experts say you only have to do that 3-4 times a week in order to see results. Do it tomorrow.

Laura:  You said that yesterday, and the day before. I'm running out of days in the week.

IEM:  Well, it's looking kind of overcast out there. It might rain. And you wear glasses without windshield wipers, so when it rains, you can't see. What if you step in a pothole? You have children to care for. You shouldn't do that to your family. Better stay home today.

Laura:  Yes, I have children to care for and I want to be alive to see them grow up, so I'd better go today.

IEM:  Speaking of which, they are probably going to wake up from their nap any minute. You probably don't have time to go jogging.

Laura:  Well, then, I'd better go now, huh? 

IEM:  Remember the dog? He followed you up the street the last time, barking ferociously. You were terrified and if that nice man hadn't chased him off, you might be in the hospital right now recovering from rabies shots.

Laura:  But maybe he won't be there today. Maybe I can carry a stick.

IEM:  That will look cool. Go ahead. Do that. And then those construction workers will really stare when you jog past.

Laura:  I'll take a different route to avoid the construction site.

IEM:  Oh, and don't forget:  your shoes are at the repair man, getting glued back together because they are five years old and falling apart.

Laura:  Aack! I forgot about that. 

IEM:  So, see, you can't go. Told you so.
​

It's called ego depletion. After arguing long enough with your Internal Excuse Maker, you run out of mental energy to make the right choice (exercise) and decide instead to raid the freezer for a Dove Dark Chocolate Bar and drink a coffee or two.

At least that's what happens to me.

PS--If you haven't yet formed a habit of reading the Word of God daily, may I personally encourage you to make that area your first venture into a No Excuse Policy? You will be amazed, as I have been, by the way the Lord personalizes your Bible reading to the challenges you face throughout your day.

Ephesians 5:22-33 describes the beauty of modeling Christ through marriage.

​Many of our resolutions are doomed to fail.  88%, in fact, if Wikipedia is correct.

We can try really hard to come up with ways to succeed . . . 

• Jonathan Edwards' pre-resolution was to read his resolutions each week.
• My husband and I had a set of goals that we read almost every month this last year. Our first goal was to each own a copy and read it monthly.  
• I recently read a motivational article by a man who advocates writing your top goals down every day.

All of these things can help.

But there one thing you cannot accomplish goals without:  discipline.

I can have all the desire in the world to complete a marathon, but unless I lace up my sneakers and actually hit the jogging trail, I'm doomed to failure. You may desire a healthy body, but unless you exercise faithfully and eat properly, you are doomed to failure.

Other helps on this topic:

Do you need a Bible Reading Plan?  
It's not too late for you to read through your Bible this year!  If that is one of your goals, don't give up.  Try out one of these six Bible reading plans.

Have you made goals for this year?
If not, it's never too late to make some.  These goal planning worksheets can help you in your endeavor.

Are you determined to follow through on your resolutions or goals for this year?
Read this article by Michael Hyatt on How To Make New Year's Resolutions Stick.

1.  Listen to the Bible on CD.  (Or, in this day and age, you can stream it.)  
When I was a child, my father often had tapes of the Bible playing in our house. Even before I could read, I loved the intonation of the words of the Bible as read by Alexander Scourby. This year one of my goals is, whenever possible, to have my children go to sleep listening to the Bible on CD. My children really enjoy this.

2.  Read Bible Stories to Them.
I remember in vivid detail the night I asked Jesus to save me from my sins. I was about four years old, and we had read the story of Christ's death on the cross during our family devotional time. Every time I think of that night, I think of the picture of Jesus on the cross from the Bible story book we read. The Bible in Pictures for Little Eyes is still one of my favorite Bible story books for little children and we use it for devotional times with our little ones. My children have loved that particular book so much that we have gone through 4 or 5 copies of it. It is hard to find now; the publisher has updated it with cartoon-like pictures, which is a real shame because the original pictures are stunning. I highly recommend the original book for children ages 1-6.

3.  Teach them Bible songs.
We had a favorite song we sang to each of our babies when we put them down to bed. In addition, with our twins, David and Daniel, we started singing "Only a Boy Named David" and "Dare to Be a Daniel" to them before they were even born. Do you teach your children songs at a young age? Here are some great ones to use:

• Psalms
• Verses put to music
• Songs about key stories in the Bible
• Songs rich in doctrine (even if they don't understand the concepts until they are older)

4.  Memorize, Memorize, Memorize.
The early years are "parrot" years. Little children are like sponges and they love to memorize. The verses you teach your toddlers will stick in their minds for years to come. In kindergarten, my class memorized a major portion of Hebrews 11 and to this day I retain most of those verses in my long-term memory. Don't underestimate the ability of even very young children to memorize. A 2- or 3-year-old child can memorize whole passages of Scripture. Memorizing is fun for small children.

5.  Set a good example.
Let them see you reading your Bible in the mornings. They will automatically pick up on your love for it. Instill a respect in them for your devotional time. When my young ones wake up early and interrupt my Bible time, I try to remind them that this is Mama's most important time of the day because I am learning about God. In addition, my little ones watch the older children read the Word of God in the early mornings. Your children innately know what is important to you and it shapes their own worldview.

These are just five of many ways to teach young children to love the Word of God.  If we want them to learn while they are still young to let the Word of God dwell in them richly, we must be intentional with our parenting.

Of course, we should always remember that the end goal is to teach them to love the God of the Word. It is through the Word of God that they will come to know, trust, and worship Him.

What do you do to teach your children to love the Bible at a young age?

Related Posts:
Zebras, Toast, and Cockroaches
Let the Word of Christ Dwell in You Richly
​Wake Up!

If you are longing to experience the full beauty of the Biblical metanarrative, try a 90 Day Bible Reading Plan.  Here are some of the pros and cons.

​What are the pros and cons of a 90 Day Bible Reading Plan?